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Might as well legally change your name.
1. A relatable pin for anyone who feels like a cat with an office job.
![And a pair of dangling earrings on their way to your island to drop off a DIY recipe. (2) And a pair of dangling earrings on their way to your island to drop off a DIY recipe. (2)](https://i0.wp.com/img.buzzfeed.com/buzzfeed-static/static/2019-05/13/14/asset/buzzfeed-prod-web-04/sub-buzz-2630-1557772081-1.jpg?downsize=700%3A%2A&output-quality=auto&output-format=auto)
alumandink
Get it from alumandink on Etsy for $10 (available with a rubber or metal backing).
2. A pack of squishy friends you can squeeze the living daylights out of whenever you're stressed. So, always?
![And a pair of dangling earrings on their way to your island to drop off a DIY recipe. (3) And a pair of dangling earrings on their way to your island to drop off a DIY recipe. (3)](https://i0.wp.com/img.buzzfeed.com/buzzfeed-static/static/2019-05/13/14/asset/buzzfeed-prod-web-02/sub-buzz-9695-1557773216-1.jpg?crop=1000%3A832%3B0%2C168&downsize=700%3A%2A&output-quality=auto&output-format=auto)
Amazon
Get a pack of 40 from Amazon for $12.98.
3. A pack of cactus socks you'll make a point of showing off to everyone.
![And a pair of dangling earrings on their way to your island to drop off a DIY recipe. (4) And a pair of dangling earrings on their way to your island to drop off a DIY recipe. (4)](https://i0.wp.com/img.buzzfeed.com/buzzfeed-static/static/2019-05/13/14/asset/buzzfeed-prod-web-03/sub-buzz-19140-1557773388-1.jpg?downsize=700%3A%2A&output-quality=auto&output-format=auto)
Amazon
Get a pack of five from Amazon for $8.99.
4. A hidden tiger print here to bring peaceful vibes to your home.
5. A fun-shaped purse you don't even have to shell out for.
Amazon
Get it from Amazon for $17.99.
6. A darling llama trinket dish that doesn't mind you if you hang a ring or two from its ears.
Amazon
Get it from Amazon for $15.66.
7. A pack of unreasonably adorable reusable bags for anyone who is not looking to partake in a second mass extinction with plastic bag waste!
Amazon
Get them from Amazon for $6.99+ (available in seven designs and four set types).
8. A Spongebob Funko Pop! doll you don't need to use your imagination to know is a good purchase.
Amazon
Get it from Amazon for $10.99.
9. A cross-body purse with a heart-shaped window so you can show off all your favorite pins and gear without worrying about it falling off during your daily routine.
Amazon
Get it from Amazon for $12.99 (available in five colors).
10. A cheesy pun brooch for people who wouldn't rind a gouda joke on their lapel.
11. A squishy macaron cushion that somehow only costs a little more than a single macaron cookie. Why do those things cost their weight in gold???
Amazon
*slaps down a $50 on the counter* gimme two of your finest fancy sandwich cookies, my good man.
Get it from Amazon for $17.99 (available in 19 colors).
12. Masterpiece painting patches with...let's say, some improvements to the original designs.
MrsLilyJun
Get them from MrsLilyJun on Etsy for $6.70.
13. A deliciously pastel light worth ice-screaming about.
Amazon
Get it from Amazon for $17.88+ (available in four colors).
14. A pack of pig pens so oinking adorable, you'll want to handwrite everything from now on. First things I'd write? Radiant, Terrific, and Some Pig.
Amazon
Get a pack of eight from Amazon for $7.59.
15. A patterned reusable (nonmedical) face mask featuring a whimsical floral design.
HelloTinyCactus
Get it from HelloTinyCactus on Etsy for $10 (available in two patterns).
16. A very small and precious Etch-A-Sketch for all your tiniest masterpieces.
Amazon
Get it from Amazon for $5.48.
17. A teeny-tiny windmill necklace so you can feel like one of those giants Don Quixote was always going on about.
18. A pair of mismatched astronaut earrings to remind you to reach for the stars — fashion-wise, anyway.
Amazon
Get them from Amazon for $2.98.
19. A Kirby cat cap that'll make your furry friend look like they're mid-Smash Bros battle.
Urban Outfitters
Get it from Urban Outfitters for $9.
20. A pack of leafy green food picks so every bit of food can be plant-based (or at least look like a plant). Nutritional loophole acquired.
Amazon
Get a pack of eight from Amazon for $4.29.
21. An iridescent sticker featuring Tom Nook and his tiny sons out catching some stars. I'd wager they're trying to craft a Taurus Bathtub. Same!
PigAndWolffy
Get it from PigAndWolffy on Etsy for $5.
22. And a pair of dangling earrings on their way to your island to drop off a DIY recipe.
MaddisonCherie
Get them from MaddisonCherie on Etsy for $13.
23. A pair of custom socks with the face of the one you love most in the world. Sorry mom, but Fido just has the cutest mug in the world.
Amazon
Get them from Amazon for $24 (available in sizes S, L and 10 colors).
24. A cheese knife because everything in the kitchen should be cute — gnome saying?
Animi Causa
Get it from Animi Causa for $18.99.
25. A ceramic tray so very happy to hold your stuff.
ModCloth
Get it from ModCloth for $20.
26. A rainbow kiddie pool to set up in your backyard so you can enjoy a quick dip whenever you want. Or keep it inside and fill with ball pit balls. Either way, you'll have some cute fun!
27. And a round corgi light that's a very good light, yes he is. Who is a good light? You are!
Urban Outfitters
Get it from Urban Outfitters for $16.
Me to this stuff:
Cartoon Network
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Reviews have been edited for length and/or clarity.